For Now (Forever Book 1) Read online

  For Now

  Kylee Richards

  Copyright © 2010 by Kylee Richards

  All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, distributed, or transmitted in any form or by any means, including photocopying, recording, or other electronic or mechanical methods, without the prior written permission of the publisher, except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical reviews and certain other noncommercial uses permitted by copyright law.

  This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, events and incidents are either the products of the author’s imagination or used in a fictitious manner. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, or actual events is purely coincidental.

  Table of Contents

  Prologue

  Chapter 1

  Chapter 2

  Chapter 3

  Chapter 4

  Chapter 5

  Chapter 6

  Chapter 7

  Chapter 8

  Chapter 9

  Chapter 10

  Chapter 11

  Chapter 12

  Chapter 13

  Chapter 14

  Chapter 15

  Chapter 16

  Chapter 17

  Chapter 18

  Chapter 19

  Chapter 20

  Chapter 21

  Chapter 22

  Chapter 23

  Chapter 24

  Chapter 25

  Chapter 26

  Chapter 27

  Chapter 28

  Chapter 29

  Chapter 30

  Chapter 31

  Chapter 32

  Chapter 33

  Chapter 34

  Chapter 35

  Chapter 36

  Chapter 37

  Chapter 38

  Chapter 39

  Prologue

  Elaina

  “I don’t see why I had to go all the way to the mall, so that she could get a stupid dress for this stupid dance, “ Braden complains as we sit in the backseat of our parent’s SUV. “The guys are waiting for me to play football. You’re not allowed to play this time,” he says looking at me. We used to get along well, but now that he is fifteen, he doesn’t have much time for his little sister.

  “Braden,” my mother warns as she turns to glare at him, “this is for your sister’s first dance; I think you can be a little late to play with your friends.”

  “Listen to your mother,” Dad adds. Mom is usually the one to scold us, but Dad always tries to backs her up. I heard them discussing it once, Mom asked him to help discipline us more, but Dad just smiled at her and asked her why when she was so good at it. She was not amused, so after that night, Dad tried helped her punish us more. However, when Mom wasn’t home, we got away with anything.

  “See, Mom, I’m right she is spoiled, you are always taking her side.”

  “Whatever!” I yell back at him as I ball my hands into fists. “You always get your way.” I’ve always thought that he was the favorite, being the oldest. It might also because he looks just like Mom and Dad; they all have dark hair and dark eyes. He used to tell me I was adopted because I don’t look anything like them with my blonde hair and green eyes. I’ve never met my mom’s family; maybe I look like them.

  Mom and Dad are sitting in the front seat, trying to tune us out as Braden and I keep fighting.

  As I’m about to tell Braden to just shut up, I hear my father’s loud gasp and look up to see a rusty, yellow sedan passing an old, red farm truck. The car is still over the solid yellow lines and Dad slams on his breaks and tries to swerve, but seconds later the sedan hits the front of our vehicle and our SUV in airborne. I hear my mother’s scream. The scream is cut off as we hit the ditch, landing upside down.

  The silence is deafening after the thunderous sound of the crash. The world seems to be spinning. My head feels wet and I can see bright red blood dripping down onto the roof of our SUV, creating a small pool. “Mom, Dad?” I croak, wondering why they aren’t trying to get us out yet.

  Out my dad’s window, which is now broken, I see a pair of black boots in the tall brown grass. Then a man I vaguely recognize as a farmer that lives just outside of town is peering into our SUV and yelling at someone to call 911. He reaches out with a shaky hand, presses his fingers to Dad’s neck, and yells to the other person that he doesn’t look like anyone made it. Dark red blood covers his fingers as he pulls his hand away. Daddy!

  I freeze at his words, unable to move, until I hear a strange gurgling sound next to me. Braden. I need to get him help. I fumble for my seatbelt, but I can’t reach it and my arm hurts so badly. I manage a small whimper.

  The man at the window glances over to me with hope in his eyes and shouts to someone behind him, “The girl is alive; quick we need to get her out.” I hear the wailing sirens of the ambulance in the distance. He runs around to my side, reaches in, and grabs my hand before murmuring in my ear. “Sweetheart, you are going to be just fine, the ambulance is almost here, just stay with me. We will get you out and you will be just fine.” I’m okay; he needs to get Mom and Braden out. I can now see that there is a bigger pool of blood below where my mom is hanging and I know she needs more help than me. We need to get her out first. Why isn’t this man trying to help anyone else? They have to get them out! This is my last thought as the world goes black.

  **********

  It has been a week since the funeral and three weeks since the accident. I was in a coma for three days due to swelling in my brain and had to be in the hospital for ten days. I probably could have gotten out earlier, but I think they were trying to give me time before I had to return to this house without my family.

  I am now sitting in my bedroom playing with the cast on my arm and looking over the cornfields behind my house trying to imagine the skyscrapers and traffic that I will now see out of my window. I’ve never been to Chicago or any big city for that matter. I’ve seen pictures of my mom growing up there, but she never wanted to visit after she left. She ran from her parents and never looked back. She was happy here living in a small town in Iowa with Dad, Braden and me. The only person she missed from Chicago was her best friend Karen who visited us every year. I loved my Aunt Karen. That is who I’ll be going to live with now. There is no one else. Dad’s parents died a few years ago and I’ve never met Mom’s parents.

  Just two weeks ago, I was a normal thirteen-year-old girl, who enjoyed riding my bike around town, playing football with my brother and his friends and begging my mom to take me and my friends to the mall. Now I’m moving to Chicago, a place so big I can’t picture it, with my Aunt Karen and her four-year-old son, Jackson. She lives in an apartment downtown. I’ve never even been in an apartment building. All of my friends live in a house in town or on a farm. So much of my life is about to change. My parents and brother are dead. If I would have not been so selfish, they would still be here with me. Why am I here without them?

  Chapter 1

  Ellie

  9 years later

  I can’t find them. I can hear them screaming, but all I can see is smoke and the tall corn. There are flames in the distance that light up the dark night and that seems to be where the screams are coming from. No matter how fast I run, I’m not getting any closer. Corn stalks are hitting me and tearing at my clothes and skin as I run, but I ignore the pain. I just need to get to them. The fire and the noise are getting further and further away. I see the bright flash of an explosion and hear my mother’s shriek.

  A scream leaves my mouth as my eyes pop open and my hands go to my chest. I sit up in bed. My heart is pounding and I’m gasping for air as I try to tell myself it wasn’t real.

  Karen comes running into the room to check on me. Poor Karen, I used to
wake her and Jackson up with my screams every night for a year after the accident. Now the only time I wake up screaming is when I’m under stress, though I still have the nightmares every night. It is always a different dream, but still they all end the same; my family is dying and I can’t save them. I always end up alone.

  Karen sits on the edge of my bed and runs her fingers through my hair like she used to do when I first moved here with her. “It has been so long since you had a nightmare, what is going on? Do you want to talk about it?” She gives me a small sympathetic smile.

  “I don’t really remember it,” I lie and give her a small smile to show her that I’m okay.

  “It’s a good thing that you have an appointment with Dr. Robins today, maybe she can help you get to the root of what is bothering you. But you know that you can always talk to me, right?”

  “Yes, I know. I guess I better get up now anyways.” I didn’t realize how late it was, but the sun is already steaming through my window. I glace at my clock and see that I only have an hour until my appointment.

  “You’re going out to lunch with Amy today right?” she asks, eyeing me. I can tell that she thinks there is more that I’m not telling her.

  “Yeah, after my appointment. I better get ready now,” I say, swinging my legs over the side of the bed. I stand and stretch, smiling at her to show that I’m truly alright.

  “Okay, I’ll see you tonight, Sweets. I’m making your favorite dessert for after dinner,” she says with a warm, motherly smile as she leaves my room and shuts the door behind her.

  I get ready in record time, but I think I did a pretty good job. I always try to look good when I go to see Dr. Robins at my now monthly appointments. If I look good, she has no reason to believe I’m not good.

  Still running late, I make my way out of the building into the hot, humid air. The amount of noise on the street is so much different that where I grew up, it still takes me by surprise sometimes. There are cabs honking, city workers fixing a pothole and I can hear pieces of conversations as people brush past me on their way to work.

  Luckily, Dr. Robins’ office is only a few blocks away. I might just make it on time. I spend the walk tying to analyze why I started screaming in my sleep again last night. I’ve been on edge lately. I feel like something is coming and it is making me uneasy. I’m not good at change. On the other hand, maybe it is just because I recently graduated and while all of my classmates are going out and doing amazing things, I’ll be here at the same job. Maybe I’m worried that nothing will change for me. I love my Aunt Karen and I want to help her at the bar, but this job isn’t my passion.

  My thoughts are cut short as I arrive at Dr. Robin’s building. I check-in and have a seat in the posh waiting room. Before the accident, I had always thought that therapists’ offices’ would be comforting and cozy, with warm colors. This office is in a newly renovated building, the walls are stark white and mostly bare. It reminds me of a padded room at an insane asylum, how fitting for a shrink.

  I pull out my phone to text Amy to discuss where we are going to have lunch. Just as I’m putting my phone away, Dr. Robins pokes her head out of her office and asks if I’m ready.

  “How are you doing?” she asks as I sit on her stiff, leather couch. “You just graduated right? That should feel pretty good.”

  “Yes, I graduated a few weeks ago. It feels good to be done.” I say as I smile at her.

  “What’s next for you? Are you staying here? Have you found a job yet?” she asks as she peers at me over her glasses.

  “No new job yet. I’m going to keep working at the bar until things settle down,” I reply as a look around her office, trying to avoid her penetrating gaze. I pretend to be interested in an abstract painting she has hanging behind her desk.

  “The bar must feel like a pretty comfortable place. I’m sure it will be hard to leave it once you get a teaching position. Will you be looking for jobs here once you start?”

  “Yes, I’ll probably stay in the neighborhood.”

  “You know that Karen will be fine if you decide to leave, though I’m sure she will miss you like crazy.” She is looking at me with a sympathetic look that I’ve come to hate. I’m tired of pity I don’t deserve it.

  “I know, I just like it here. It‘s become my home,” I reply.

  “Okay,” she says, but I can tell she doesn’t believe me.

  We spend the next hour with her asking questions about my plans for the future and me giving half answers.

  When I make my way back outside, I can finally breathe a little easier. These appointments always make me a little anxious. Now I can go have lunch with Amy. She can always make me laugh with her crazy antics.

  Amy is leaning against the side of the building waiting for me. I‘m glad I dressed up, I always feel a little insecure around Amy. She is the type of girl that most guys dream of. She has long, dark brown hair, huge brown eyes and a body that models would kill for. This is what gets her tips at the bar, I know it isn‘t her excellent service. “Hey, girlie. Ready to go?” she asks.

  I nod at her, “Sure, lead the way.”

  My thoughts return back to the nightmare and my screaming last night as Amy, prattles about some concert that she wished that she had the money to go to. Talking about how their hot guitarist is. I just keep nodding, to make is seem like I’m paying attention, there are never any breaks in her stories, so I know I won’t have to respond anyways.

  We get to the café and are lead to a table by the windows.

  “So, how was the shrink today? Everything okay?” she asks.

  “Yeah, it’s great. Just talked about graduation.” I glace out the window at the people walking by.

  “Are you leaving me now?” she pouts.

  “No, I’ll be here as long as Karen needs me at the bar.”

  “Karen will be just fine without you, though, selfishly I hope you stay. The bar wouldn’t be as fun without making you blush in front of some of the hotter customers.”

  “Maybe I should leave then. You tried to auction me off last night,” I remind her.

  “Hey, you were going for a lot of money. I don’t think you understand that you are the reason that we have some of the regulars. They could get a drink anywhere or, hell drink at home, but some of them come in several nights a week to see you.”

  I roll my eyes. “Whatever, I think you are obviously on something.”

  “That is why they all sit wherever you are working. Your tables are always a lot busier than mine.”

  “Maybe that is because, I actually remember to bring them their drinks.”

  She sticks her tongue out at me and I laugh.

  Leave it to Amy to make me forget about everything and make me laugh. I really do love this girl.

  Chapter 2

  Camden

  Look at that jackass, at the rate he’s going, tonight could be bad. My father is going to kill me. It is my job to keep Ryder happy, but also keep him in line. That is a fine line to walk when you work for a rock star.

  I look around the bar and sigh; it is the same thing night after night. Clubs and bars. Though, they all try to be original and have something special, they are all the same. Same dull girls. Same watered-down drinks. Same lame music.

  The club is dark, aside from the steady flash of the strobe lights and the music is earsplitting. This combination is making my head throb. There are desperate girls in tight dresses trying to impress the guys standing at the bar watching them.

  “Yo Cam, come check these girls out.” Ryder yells over the music. I just want to go home and go to bed, since I won’t get to sleep in my own bed for a few months. Ryder’s band, Line 9, is going on tour and it will be tour buses, and the occasional hotel.

  “Don’t you think we should be going home? We have a lot of stuff to do tomorrow before the tour. We leave in two days.”

  “Dude, you mean you have a lot of stuff to do tomorrow. You know I hate packing and you’re so much better at it,” he looks a
t me with a grin because he knows I’ll do it.

  “Thanks dude,” I mumble under my breath and roll my eyes. He doesn’t see because he is back to watching a few girls making out on the dance floor, trying to give him a good show. I guess this is why he pays me. He is lucky that he happens to be one of my best friends or I would have told him to take this job and shove it a few years ago. The two of us grew up together; my dad managed his dad’s band when we were kids. His mom and dad were never around, always on a tour or at a party, so he stayed with us a lot. My mom thought of him as one of her own. Several years later, Ryder has a band of his own and my dad is managing him. That is how I got stuck with this gig as his bitch. I’m sorry, I meant personal assistant. It isn‘t all bad, I get to see the country and hang out with my best friend, who isn’t always a total jerk.

  A redhead saunters up to Ryder. “Aren’t you Ryder Kinick from Line 9?” she says in her most annoying baby voice. Really? Why do girls think that is so hot?

  “Yeah, you wanna go somewhere more private?” No way should this line work. I roll my eyes.

  “Sure, let me grab my things,” she purrs. Of course, she went for that, I guess when you are rich and famous, it doesn’t matter how much game you got. He could say “Hey baby, let’s bone” and she would be ready to go to the nearest bathroom for a quickie.

  I trudge through the crowd, towards the exit to get Ryder’s car because I can see that I’m going to be driving Ryder and his groupie to his place tonight and I’ll probably be taking her home in a few hours. Am I ever going to get some sleep?

  I glance back at Ryder, there is a big, bald man heading right for him. Before I have a chance to do anything, Ryder turns to head towards the exit, gets a fist to the jaw and is down on the ground. Oh no, this isn’t good.

  “Where the fuck do you think you are going with my girlfriend, asshole?” the man roars.

  Ryder blinks, raises his hand to his mouth, and pulls it away to check for blood. He stands up and then his fists start flying. Ryder is a lot stronger than he looks, he is tall and thin, he looks small compared to my 6’2 230-pound frame, but he is aggressive and knows how to fight dirty. We were always playing around as kids and trying to kick each other’s asses, I always won of course, but I was able to teach him a lot about how to fight smart. My mom let me take boxing lessons as a kid and I learned a lot. It came in handy now trying to deal with the crazy ass fans when we are out together.